Go ahead, sell me

I have no resistance to salesmen. I need to just stay away from them. They've cost me so much money and pain over the years... how much did I pay for my Neon? How much did I pay for my laptop? Let's just say that I'm not going to say. It's embarassing.

This is relevant now because for some reason I let the assigned stockbroker for my stock option account come talk to me for an hour, and convince me to put my money into riskier bonds. Now I'll probably go broke and end up begging for change in the streets.

I should just liquidate all my assets and set up a compound out in the wilderness, where I could shoot anyone who looked like they were trying to sell me anything. Then I'd have piece of mind.

Hate Speech

Islam is a religion of violence. They worship a *boxer*, for christ's sake! And everyone knows what boxers do... that's right, bite off peoples' ears.

Damn foreign terrorists. How are our home-grown terrorists supposed to compete with government subsidized operatives from overseas, who're willing to not only risk getting caught but actually kill themselves in the process? We need tarrifs, or possibly a ban on imports, or the next Timothy McVeigh might end up putting rat poison in Big Macs instead of reaching his full potential.

And that's why we need to attack the middle east now -- we've become dependant on foreign terrorists and need to secure the supply.